The holidays can be a difficult time for most people. Many individuals feel depressed and stressed during this season, and often people identify their families as being a major source of stress surrounding the holidays. Here are some ideas help with the stress of the holidays and handle potential conflicts that may arise.
1. Don't be surprised if some conflict arises. If it is typical that arguments occur in your family, expect it to happen again! Prepare yourself by practicing or re-reading the four agreements (see post dated November 11th: "Are you living the four agreements). These agreements will help you handle your father's criticism, your mother's passive aggressive statements and your brother's dirty jokes!
2. Rotate which families you will visit. If you and your spouse both want to celebrate with your extended family, or their is a divorce situation to consider where not everybody wants to celebrate together or if you just have a lot of family, it can be aggravating to decide who to see, and when. Taking turns is an easy solution. Celebrate Thanksgiving with one family and Christmas with another.
3. If your family is going to cause you too much unnecessary stress, it is okay to turn down invitations to participate. It is reasonable to say, "We've decided to spend this year with our kids and keep the holiday simple, but thanks for the invite!"
4. Make sure that you spend some time with friends. Talking about your stress to a safe person you can confide can help immensely!
Good luck!
2 comments:
Jade, Thanks for your comments on stress and family during the holidays. Some of the questions I have, is what if going home causes painful memories? What if you have a secret regarding a family member that no one else in the family knows?
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